Friday, October 24, 2008

Don't burn your bras, stuff em!

Is it just my imagination, or are the journalists in this town getting slinkier by the minute?

I grew up watching Linda Lorelle, Marlene McClinton, Shara Fryer; all exceptional journalists, but no cleavage. In truth, the world wasn't ready for sexy at six o'clock and our moms' generation was more concerned with being treated as "equals."

Today's women in media are not "equal" because they're in a class by themselves, a sorority of media vixens! Every one of them -- statuesque, chiseled, sultry... The reporters are getting cuter, but if you want a chair, you better be smokin' hot.

You might call this a tribute to the girls who put the "boob" in boob tube. I'm in awe at the way they strut their stuff unabashedly each night. There is no conflict of interest with the feminist in me. We're talking about journalists who are udderly qualified and also pretty. Looks matter, and they've capitalized professionally.

Kudos for using all your assets to make the news fun to watch!
I present, our three favorites...

The Red Head

The Red Head needs no introduction. I love watching her command that desk. No weather-princess is going to upstage her. But as MMA keeps reminding me, she's chosen an unforgiving business and her days are numbered...some young hottie is waiting in the wings to steal that chair if she's crazy enough to take another maternity leave.

Just between us girls, D, the standard you've set is impossibly high. Three out of five days you look ready to hit the clubs after work, and on the suit-days we gape and wonder, "how does your tailor consistently manage such a tiny margin of error?" Those stressed upper buttons never move. We know, we're staring. Is it tiring to be so fabulous every day? Signed, Your biggest Fan

Lovely Ilona

A newer anchor, one we rarely get to see, is Ilona Carson at Channel 13. According to MMA, she's Dominique, Version 2.0: younger, blonder, bigger lips. (Hey, we said it's a cruel business.) On rare occasion that I catch her act, she's rock-solid: well-heeled, serious, and serious eye-candy. I'm guessing that only a few cup sizes separates her from the big-time.

Keep an eye on that Ilona, I know my husband will...

Saucy Lucy

This sorority could go on and on, so I'll give just one last nod to Lucy Noland. She's the exotic china doll who replaced Lisa Foronda at 11 last year. Of course, knowing there was a new girl in town, my household did all the research. Can you believe she's a single mom and has a kid in high school? Bet they all want to play at little Jimmy's house after school.

I read that an on-air joke in NY was made about her being "bootielicious" on account of her curves and fresh style. It hit the airwaves and Wikepedia made note. She successfully fought to have that reference removed. I'm sure its hard enough for her to be taken seriously...

I know, I know, we're weird news-anchor-junkies in this house. MMA is a man, and I'm not sure what my excuse is. I guess its true, the saying that women dress for other women.

Who is your favorite local media personality?

Do share if you have any inside scoop for my readers!

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Another B-day to Shout About

I think this may be my last Birthday Shout Out because with my condition (shit head) I fully risk forgetting someone very, very important. So we're going to have rules and order here...But its a big-even-rounded-to-the-next-decade Birthday for Erna.

Erna has a straightforward name that any second grader could sound out, yet at her high school graduation ceremony, the principal butchered both her names and said something like Erna McCann...just wrong to do to an 18 year old. So that is how she will be referred to henceforth. Hee, Hee.

Let me share a few reasons why she is wonderful:

1. She bought and wore the bridesmaid dress I picked for my wedding and never complained and even told me that she loved it.

2. She's always willing to try new restaurants, wines and activities of my choosing, even when its not her cup of tea.

3. Once upon a time we were roommates and she was a very considerate person to live with. (Me, not so much, always.)

4. She is forever telling me how beautiful Only Child is even when he acts up around her.

5. Wine cruises.

This picture was taken after more than a few laughs and some liquor, I think. I asked her take my picture for Facebook because I kept hearing from my high school friends that I had to get on and see what everyone was up to. But I decided against it because, do-I-really-care-to-go-over-the-annotated-version-of-the-last-15-years, by email, a dozen times/week? Check out my blog...

Laboring to get the perfect shot, which we agreed was a vain use of thirty minutes, turned silly and then it turned ridiculous and hysterical. In the end we didn't like any of our individual pictures all that much. But we liked this one and we'll forever have a memory of that fun day when we went to lunch and the waitress came to take our order carrying her six month old baby on her hip...only in P-land, Texas.

Happy Birthday, My Dear! You don't look a day over 26 and you look like you had your lips professionally plumped.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

My Dish on Dreaming Big and Eating Well


I told you that our friend is making good on a dream and we were there Saturday at the VIP party to celebrate with him.

CJ is his name and he is a good guy. We met in college, both of us waiting tables at a quirky place called Bombay Bicycle Club -- which wasn't at all like the name implied. (I'm not sure what the name implied.)

I was new to the "joys" of waitressing and he was kind to me, reminding me many times over the years not to sweat a bad tip or an ugly customer because "things always work out in the end." And don't they? That evil assistant manager who made made my life hell...she finally got booted. And once I started seeing the working conditions from CJ's point of view (great hours, good money) it was a pretty sweet gig, and I am glad I stuck with it.

Rumor has it CJ was forced to graduate or face a whole new catalog. So, despite a knockout-effort to keep those sweet college days alive, eventually, ten good years did amount to a Master's in Petroleum Engineering. That's the day job.

The dream was always to run a restaurant. And CJ was doing R&D before he even realized it, working both the front and the back of the house at various restaurants. I remember a project of several months that he initiated to cut food costs without affecting the customer experience or food quality (no college hours involved, folks.) While the rest of us were just "schlepping food," he was taking advantage of an opportunity, never afraid of getting rice under his nails.

So how could I not feel some sense of pride on Saturday at the kickoff party? I saw our little bird fly out into the real world and now he's all grown up. CJ's building the nest he always imagined and he's ready to see what he's made of....if all the planning was realistic, if his chops are ready, if his instinct will lead the way. I'm so rooting for him!

I feel strangely involved, knowing I was there when it was just an idea and nothing more. And now its four walls and a heartbeat. I am amazed by how developed the concept was in his mind all this time. The name, the menu, the food, even the pictures on the wall were all described to me years ago.

Did CJ revise it silently while doing the day job that made this possible? Did he rehearse the details in his mind everyday on his drive home? And where did the patience come from to work on a business plan for years, when he could have surely thrown his hat into the ring sooner?

The Dream is called The Far Seas Grill: casual food, exotic and familiar flavors (OK, so I made up the tag line to help convey the idea.) Its a fusion restaurant that serves up burritos, stuffed pitas, and "mixing bowls" with a little bit of everything. The flavors are inspired by TexMex, Asian, and Mediterranean cuisine and the house signature is a huge made-from-scratch egg roll, (his mom's recipe) assembled in full view as you meander along the counter-serve line. Heaven for a foodie like me, but there's something even the pickiest eater would enjoy. Great prices, too!

Of course CJ has some kinks to work out but even the corporate dynasties started somewhere. And don't you yearn to see the family-run places go up against the Starbuckses of the world and MAKE IT? Yah? Then I'm not afraid to ask you to give 'em a try.

And there's my dish on dreaming big and eating well!

The Far Seas Grill is opening this week in Katy, Texas (Barker Cypress exit.)

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Who do I have to kill to get some Pseudoephedrine!?

'Way I'm feeling, don't think I won't use some of my aforementioned skills to get some juice to clear my nose. I actually dreamed I was at the drug store and the pharmacist was a slightly overweight black man in a police uniform admonishing me from behind the counter. I start hollering-up how "this crap over here doesn't work." He walks over, club in hand, and I'm about to be the victim of some social injustice. Then I wake up to a blistered tongue before I get beat down or get any PSE...(that's how you text it, by the way.)

I think the real injustice is that a nice, repectable suburban lady can't get the drugs she so needs in her time of desire. What, you say...Show my license?...Why would I ever volunteer that?...Do you think they keep some kind of database?...Of course I'm kidding...No, you're crazy!...Fine, I'm stupid, just give me what you have there...You know I'm good for it.